goodbye march

i have a wonderful time on this month but have to admit, its a bullshit month either. i lost you. when i lost you, i lost everything . i miss you but i refuse to admit it. why should i miss you. why should i let my self and my heart think about you. u never think about me do you? you're enjoying ur life now . u have a perfect life with the girls out there. but im standing here, crying. what should i be that stupid. why should i let my self act like im stupid. i love you. still love you. but i will force myself to let you go. slowly, i will. your memories will stay with me.but it just you and yourself will go far far away from me. its time to learn how to let go. all the things you love is not gonna make u happy sometimes. how did u do this? forget about me easily. not missing me like im missing you. its easy for you but i hate myself because its hard for me to do that. march is my last month i spend my beauty pretty life with someone called, my love, my munchkin, my bulat. move on is a simple words. easy to pronounce but hard to make it happens. i noe some day, i will move on from this. but when is the some day ? 
i dont regret for knowing you. i dont regret for loving you. all i regret is, i dont do my best while im with you. wonderful moments with you will stay. but missing you will gone. some day azah. sabar. why do i have to feel this thing? i felt it twice. this is the third. from the same person. but still i cannot let my self to hate you. why azah. dont be so bodoh ! people keep on saying, azah u cn do this. forget about him. dah la ngis. heyy they dont understand. its easy to say but hard to make it happen. we used to do everything together.he's part of my life.  i will let my self to love some one else just like i give my heart to you. insyaAllah :)

you lost the love i love the most .

i called you. and the way you treat me , you talk to me like im a shit to you. ok thats fine. you yang nk i cntct ngn u but this is what i get. this is the reason why i dont want to call you. i miss you. thats why i call you. but u talk to me like a shit. then u called me back. without asking me what i want, you're just babbling. ok thats hurting me. im not gonna call you. i used to be your favorite hello but now seems like im your favorite goodbyes. you like this and i will make sure that im not gonna cll you again. i try to not missing you even i noe i cant. i'll make my self busy. if you can move on, so do i.  have a nice day amirul aiman. thanks for all the memories . and im wondering who's the next girl like u always did when we broke up. qurratu, frah radzi and who's next man ? im ready for it. 

bring it on ! 

its time to let go. you're not mine and thats the fact. we were always meant to say goodbye kan. we have to move on no matter what. u'll stay in my memories forever. now, tonite, i let myselft to move on :)   move on from my sweet life with you. thanks for everything . you're my hardest goodbye. u hurt me . but hey. thanks ! at least you teach me this is life. people you love gonna hurt you  someday ! :) thanks .

sory

im soory. i have to let you go. its not because i hate you. its because of your attitude. the way you treat me .





we have learn to let go kn. so yeahhh this is the time for me to let you go. have fun and be safe :)

BUSY ! grrr

yeahhh im a busy woman now . damn im fucking damn tired and i hope to get a massage for free now. uhhhh i can feel it. hahahahah. assingments has freaking me out. i hate you . ha tu la sape suruh buat kerja last minute kan padan muka awak azahot ! hahahha * i found a new cute name for me ! :D

i've just bought new shoes ! thanks mama ! hehehe. ohh yeahh i'm getting better with indesign . yes finally. al maklum lah saya buta IT hahahha. lab test is good actually. because of that, i noe how to use indesign.

hope that all my works will done perfectly, AMIN .  u go azah u can do this. stay up and do your works. ! jgn pk n makan n tido je. mcm mana nak ade bf kalau mcm tu *ok tiba2 ! hahahahah

oh Fara, if you read this . HYE FARA . hahahaaha have a great weekends with you. ohh yea forgot to mention that hari tu jumpa NABILA BABY ! :)   lama x jumpa and miss u so badly ! thanks to faiz cz willing nak dtg klang bwk nabila ! 

my beloved munchkin , i miss you and i wish that u cn still be mine :(

i know im rock kan ? hahahahah ok bye peeps ! 

a better life without you? the answer is HELL NO ! :(

                                   i miss you so badly :(

when someone ask me how i live my life without you, i cannot put it on words. if they're asking me am i having a good life without you.. the answer is HELL NO .!  i miss you so badly. im crying again and again and again. i need you to make me stop crying. i need you to wipe all my tears. i need you . but i dont know why we have to ended up like this munchkin. i love you, i need you but i have to leave you. im sorry. sorry for everything. sorry for all my words. i ckp u ni membosan kan i. but actually,  a life without you yg membosan kan. with you i feel everything. everything that i just cnot describe it on words. all i know now is i really miss you. feel like wanna cll u. but things is not like before. im not yours so im afraid to call you. afraid if you with someone else, and i feel the hurt. yeahh maybe u have someone else already *like u always did when we break up. 
i online just now. and jaja ade wall pic rabbit. and suddenly you cross my mind. do you remember bitbit? winwin? and birthday you i though nk beli kan rabbit. nk celebrate ngn you. but then, all the plan is change.  im soory amirul aiman. because we have to turn out this way. im sorry because i break all the promises. i want you back. but, as usual there's always a but kan? i want you back but........   u, be safe and take care. hope u're good with tempat kje baru u. i want to see you. but i tau, im not strong enough to face you and i dont know if we still cn be friends after this. because in my heart, i still love you as my special one not as a friend. if i ignore you after this, im sorry. dont blame me. its not because i have someone else but im just afraid if im not strong enough to be friends with you. i dont want to hurt you with my words anymore. so i should go. my words is just so tajam for you. bear this in mind, you're always with me. i noe u will not read this. but i dont know why, i just wanna tell you here that i love you amirul aiman . and i will always do.
and dear amirul aiman, after this please find a good gf. gf yg baik. bukan mcm 2 org bitch tu. :)  heheehhe.

take care, be safe, XOXO.

jumpa bie ! rinduuuuuu !

today lepas rindu ! hahahahha meet my b and only b, adam najmi :P

amirul aiman :(

yes i start to miss u now. its all because last night, i was read this two blog about their late bf :(  when i read the first blog, i cried. its not because of you, but as human being i felt that its sad to read that blog. her bf died because of accident and the reason why she created the blog is as  way to communicate  with her late bf. he wish birthday and anniversary. tell stories to her late bf using blog. then, i open the 2nd blog. which they have the same situation. their bf died because of an accident. but when i read the 2nd blog, i cried and i cnot stop crying. why? it is because her late bf share the same name as you, AMIRUL AIMAN. when i read all the blogs, i was imagine, how if one day, u will leave me forever.? i will never gonna be strong like them if this thing happens to me. u cross my mind whenever i read the 2nd blog. every words i read, more tears came fall. now, i started to miss you. miss all the things that we used to do together. we share the laugh and tears. shit i miss you now. bila i call u semalam time i ngis tu, i felt so calm. to hear ur voice again. and we text kejap. he said that he'll pray for me to find some one better one day. but i think, it takes a milion years to find some one else and start to have a new boyfie. im just not ready. because i still love you. my love for you is too deep. and u mention about ur new car. :(   i still remember before this u promise me that im gonna be the first girl to ride ur new car. but now, im no longer yours and im not gonna be the first girl :(   btw, congrats on your new car. dah xde org buat sampah dlm kereta u lagi lepas ni okay munchkin? :D   and just now, you're mention about ur new job. this sunday gonna be ur last day at Subang. we have so much memories there and now, both of us gonna start move on. leaving all the memories apart from us. i miss you and i still love you. but i'll pray for you to find a perfect girl for you. you're handsome and kind, and u deserve better. i dont deserve you. you just too kind for  me i think. but all i know is, i will never ever find a man like you :) thanks for all the memories that we shared together. im not gonna forget about that. take care and please be safe munchkin. you're my man :)  

  p/s : i love you till the  end :)

                                            best i ever had :)

kedekut !

KEDEKUT ok. when we heard at this words coming out from peoples, we immediately think a negative tough for the person who is kedekut. but like seriously tonite, im saying that SOMETIMES WE NEED TO BE KEDEKUT OKAY. done lend ur money to people easily. im not talking back rite now i just let people noe what i feel. i lost my budget because i let u to pinjam some duit from me. but please pay back when i really need that money.  please. from now on, i have to be strict. im not gonna let people lend money from me. no more no more peeps. dah SERIK. i dont have money because of you. i try to understand your situation, but cn u understand mine too? if you read this, im sorry. i dont mean anything. dont mean to hurt you with my words but i just need to do something thats make me forget about what you did. im mad at you now. its not because i dont like you but i need to use some money. !!!!!!! :'(  this gonna be the last. no more money from me okay? sorry.

rindu

i miss you :( 

amazing day . Alhamdulillah :)

so many things happen today. but everything was great :) alhamdulillah

ok first, he called :)   ohh i forget to mention about him. he's my only one  and my everything but now,  its gone. yeahhh we broke up like 3 or 4 days ago (i cant remember) BUT, deep inside, i still love him. why? i think he's my perfect one but we end up like this. i dont know what happen. maybe we're just too young to feel what love is. i expect too much from him even though i noe, he will never evr do what i expect for. but, x semua dia buruk. my dear AA, i still love you for who you are but i just want you to be sweet. i miss the old you. i miss us. i miss what we used to be. u, dulu u sweet. u did everything for me. u baked cake and kuih dori for me . but now, i feel like i x kenal u dah. u selalu marah2 i and u dah malas nak layan i. i tau u still love me and u penat dgn keja. but im not the girl that will understand you. im soory for what i have done to you, for what i have said to you but seriously, i will never ever found a perfect man for me like you. i have to leave you for now. in future, i'll pray for us. i will always love you. u will always stay here with me. in my mind and my heart. i love you and i really do my AA :(  i rindu you. now, before tido, there's no one yg nak dgr i mmbebel, tell all my stories. when i did something, i rasa mcm nak cll u. because i dah biasa cerita kat you ape yg i buat. i miss all of this. i dont want to use u just to have someone to talk about my life. all i want is you, you and you to be with me and live happily ever after. take care sayang. *rindu nak panggil u with all the cute names!

today x bangun pegi class modern issue. MALAS! :D then duduk dalam bilik je diam2 .  makan and class. what a boring life kan? maghrib, deena and ryn kecoh2 kat level, jerit and pekik and mcm2 lagi la pasal burung hantu kat dang wangi ni ade kat pokok depan. GOSH!  bila dgr je, i was like NAK TGKKKKKKKKK (padahal time ni dlm toilet okay!) running like a Casanova chasing a girl ehh no, a bitch,yeahh dpt jugak main2 dgn burung hantu tu. awww so cute.mcm harry potter punya burung hantu. then malam, go to KARYA, karnival penghayatan budaya. i have to act with COMEL and im, playing a role as a MOM ! a bad bad mom who did a child abuse towards her son. i was afraid at first. ye la skrip baru dpt ptg tu jugak. then, alhamdulillah. everyting was perfect.  i love doing it and padan muka kau comel aku meng-abuse kau betul2. hahahahha :D

esok x nak g class advert boleh? :D
thats all.
love, AS :) 

:)

read that. !

hahah i'm so so so excited with my blog. damn ok azah. behave. actually, i was dreaming to have a blog since i broke up with my bf which is 2 last year ago. BUT, im quite lame. tak tau mcm mana nk bukak blog. HAHAHA but today yeahhhh its feel like a dream comes true man ! HAHAHA

I'm a blogger ! FINALLY :)

YES ! i'm finally a blogger. this blog was made by ME, on 22nd march 2011 , 2.02 :AM P yaww with a little help from RYN !  :)

what makes me want to be a blogger?

1) i love writing and tell all my stories but  sometimes i just dont know where i can tribute my stories :D 

p/s : i'm quite LAME so just dont get bored with me peeps !